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Monday 9 August 2010

'twas but a short honeymoon, yet a sweet one.

I'm back. It's been a while, because the only real milestone I've reached in the Quest in the last couple of weeks has been finally seeing the Lost finale and if we're honest I think we can all agree that talking about Lost is getting a little old now. We all have our own opinion as to whether the finale was a heartwarming, tearjerking, masterpiece or a total betrayal of 6yrs of buildup that spat in the face of the fans. Myself, I'm in the former camp. I loved every second of it and I doubt we'll see it's like again, at least not for a very long time.

But if I'm not gonna do a long piece about Lost what am I gonna write about?

So I got to thinking, why must I only write about shows I've seen all of, why must every post be about a milestone. The very first show I ever wrote about on here was Power Rangers and I hadn't seen all of that, not by a long chalk. Of course the show had just reached a major turning point so I guess...no, my point stands. I've let myself fall into rules about what I can and can't write about and it's nonsense. It's my blog, no-one else cares, why should I restrict myself in this fashion. Enough I say.

So, without further ado I give you Heroes, Season 4, about halfway through.

First up, because I'm shallow, Claire appears to be turning lesbian, which would be loads more fun than it is had she not chosen the least attractive girl at school to fall for.

Her Dad meanwhile, is copping off with the good looking cop from S1 of Angel who doesn't seem to have aged a day in the years since then which just makes their affair seem slightly wrong.

The Petrelli family regurgitates all the same turgid soap opera we've been watching for the last 3 years. Sylar wanders around getting into various scrapes designed to give Zachary Quinto something to do while failing miserably to disguise the fact that the character should never have survived past the S1 finale. And the 2 stories are linked because Nathan is actually really Sylar and Sylar is just in Matts head and ooh, isn't it all complex and clever? And Ali Larter is still knocking around, off and on, plodding from one manufactured existential crisis to another without a hint of any real character development. Although this may be a good thing, since in her case the writers seem to think that character development means giving her a new character.

Then we have Samuel, the very very very dull Big Bad, who is played by Robert Knepper and therefore has absolutely no right to be dull. Whats going on? That his character is based in a carnival only adds insult to injury, conjuring up as it does some very unfavourable comparisons with another previous Knepper show, Carnivale. Although I hesitate to mention that stone classic in the same paragraph as this dross.

And of course Hiro and Ando, the adorable double act that we all fell in love with in S1, what are they up to? Well, pretty much the same thing they've been up to since then. Namely, finding new ways to be separated for long periods of time in order to deprive us of said double act. Despite every scrap of evidence pointing to the fact that neither character is a fraction as interesting on their own. Did Star Trek do a 6 episode arc where Spock sat on his arse in a cafe while Kirk went looking for his girlfriend? Did Miami Vice do half a season of Crocket doing some paperwork while Tubbs went off to find himself. I think not ladies and gentlemen, for one very good reason. It would have been shit.


There is also a woman who manipulates sound, or perceives sound in a certain way or something, I'm not sure. It's definitely to do with sound though. Anyway, it makes lots of pretty colours in the air. And she's a Doctor. And I think Peter fancies her. Or something. She's also deaf, as is the actress who plays her, who apparently used to play a deaf FBI agent. I'm not sure how that worked but I'm intrigued.


So does anyone remember when this show was good? No, me neither. Because it was never good. Before it was rubbish it was bloody excellent. The first season was an absolute masterpiece of serialised storytelling that had me for one on the edge of my seat for episode after episode after episode. Although those more versed in American comics history than I am may have something to say about how much of that was Tim Krings doing and how much was a blatant...er...homage. I couldn't possibly comment.

I even maintained the faith during the much derided second season with it's comedy oirish and bizarre time travel shenanigans. Even if Peter did get over his bit of stuff awful quickly. Is she still stuck in the future? I forget.

It was when Season 3 got underway that I realised my benefit of the doubt was being abused and the show was, in all likelihood, never going to be great again. It was truly a sad day. I watch a lot of tosh for the Quest and frankly, when something truly special comes along it's a real breath of fresh air. Sadly, Heroes legacy is more likely going to be a faint, lingering aroma of damp farts.